For most people, Denmark is not a summer destination. When you think of sandy beaches, clear blue water, and half-naked people, Denmark is probably somewhere far in the back of your mind.
I object! And you're not allowed to laugh at me (du må ikke grine ad mig)--people always do. Especially anyone from The States or Australia. But I'm gonna say it anyway (men jeg siger det alligevel). Denmark does get hot. I can hear you laughing, stop it (hold nu op!).
Well, for me at least it gets hot. I'm used to the cold (Jeg er vant til kulden). I'm used to putting on layer after layer during the long winter months. For me, anything over fifteen degrees is warm. Anything over twenty is hot. If the thermometer hits twenty-five, I'm a puddle of mess. I'm sensitive when it gets hot (når der er meget varmt, bliver jeg sensativ).
But Copenhagen transforms in the summer (København forvandler om sommeren). People flood out to the harbour and the beaches become lined with half-naked, white bodies begging to be baked to a crispy red finish. And it doesn't take much heat (der behøves ikke at være meget varmt). The first lick of sun and the Danes are out of hibernation.
Okay, so the beaches in Denmark don't compare to Paradise Beach in Greece or Anse Source d’Argent in Rio de Janeiro, and neither does the temperature. But Denmark is also charming (Denmark er også charmerende). We have a huge thermometer in the centre of the city, opposite the city hall. People always find it so funny that it only goes up to thirty degrees.
The hottest temperature (Den varmeste temparatur) ever recorded in Denmark was thirty-six degrees in Holstebro, Midtjylland, 1975. The coldest (Den koldeste) was thirty-one in Hørsted, 1982. But these are two extremes, neither common nor average.
Amager beach is a popular spot to take a dip for Copenhageners. The water never really gets warm, but it doesn't matter (Det er lige meget). In fact, there's this thing in Denmark known as dipping. All year round, people take off all their clothes and dip into the cold water (folk tager alt deres tøj af, og så dypper de sig i det kolde vand), and get back out again. It's shocks your immune system. It's healthy. It's fun (Det er sundt. Det er sjovt).
Canadians do this kind of thing once per year, Copenhageners are doing it all year round. So don't be surprised if you walk along the beach and see a naked butt on the harbor. It's totally normal here! (her er det helt normalt!).
Denmark is more known for brooding grey skies, harsh winds, and rain. It rains a lot here, but it doesn't mean anything (her regner det meget. men det betyder ikke noget). People are out on their bikes all year round, even in the snow. The cycle lanes are cleared first during the winter months. However, many people migrate during the winter, like Danish speaking raptors in search of warmer territory.
Here are two Danish videos I made based on the weather. One about the summer and one about a vacation gone wrong for a poor Dane in search of warmer weather. No actors received sunburns during the making of these videos (notice the pale skin).
Narrated by Thomas.
Den Forfærdelige Ferie - The Awful Vacation
Jeg havde virkelig lyst til at tage på ferie = I really wanted to go on vacation
Jeg havde brug for lidt fred og ro = I needed a little peace and quiet
Nogle gange koster det penge at rejse, men det er altid det værd = Sometimes it costs money to travel, but it's always worth it
Jeg havde tænkt mig at tage til Spanien, hvor vejret er meget bedre = I wanted to go to Spain, where the weather is much better
Men først var jeg nødt til at aftale det med min chef = But first I needed to arrange it with my boss
Jeg håbede virkelig at vi kunne finde ud af noget = I really hoped we could work something out
Og det kunne vi! Så jeg syndte mig hjem og købte en flybillet = And we could! So I rushed home and bought a plane ticket
Fedt! Det lykkedes! Jeg købte en billig billet online = Cool! Success! I bought a cheap ticket online
Jeg sad og tænkte over, hvad jeg skulle tage med = I sat and thought about what I should take with me
Jeg tog selvfølgelig solcreme og kondomer med, to slags beskyttelse = I of course took sun cream and condoms with me, two kinds of protection
Jeg købte rejseforsikring, bare for at være på den sikre side = I bought travel insurance, just to be on the safe side
Jeg reserverede også en plads ved vinduet, da jeg elsker at kigge ud på skyerne = I also reserved a place by the window, because I love to look out at the clouds
Jeg bliver altid lidt nervøs når jeg flyver, men så drikker jeg bare en øl = I always get a little nervous when I fly. But then I just drink a beer
Det hjælper mig til at slappe af, og så falder jeg oftest i søvn = It helps me to relax, and then I often fall asleep
Da vi endelig landede i lufthavnen, og jeg trådte ud af flyet, gik jeg helt i selvsving = When we finally arrived in the airport and I stepped out of the plane, I went into total overdrive
Da jeg ankom, var jeg meget frisk og klar til at nyde solen = When I arrived, I was so fresh and ready to enjoy the sun
Jeg lagde mine ting på hotellet of tog på stranden med det samme = I dropped my things and the hotel and went straight to the beach
Jeg svømmede lidt, men blev forskrækket, da jeg lagde mærke til noget der lignede in haj = I swam a little, but got scared when I noticed something that looked like a shark
Så lagde jeg mig tilbage på stranden, og slikkede lidt sol = Then I lay back on the beach and licked a little sun
En dejlig kvinde gik forbi og vinkede til mig, så jeg var nødt til at være lidt cool = A lovely women walked by and waved to me, so I needed to play it cool
Jeg faldt i søvn, og da jeg vågnede op, kunne jeg mærke noget var galt = I fell asleep, and when I woke up I noticed something was wrong
Der var sket noget, noget forfærdeligt = Something had happened, something awful
Nogen havde stålet mine shorts, jeg var helt nøgen = Someone had stolen my shorts, I was totally naked
Jeg var blev solbrændt på hele kroppen, hold kæft, hvor gjorde det ondt = I was sunburnt all over my body. Fuck, how it hurt
Solen var på vej ned, jeg havde sovet i tre timer = The sun was on its way down, I had slept for three hours
Der var overhovedet ikke nogen på stranden, alle var gået hjem = There was absolutely no one on the beach, everyone had gone home
Om Sommeren - During the Summer
Skal vi gå ud i haven = Shall we go out in the garden
Jeg har tænkt mig at lave lidt havearbejde = I want to do a little gardening
Det er solskinsvejr i dag = The weather is sunny today/The sun is shining today
Hunden har det sjovt i haven = The dog is having fun in the garden
Det er så dejligt at nyde solen = It is so lovely to enjoy the sun
Nu er det tid til at tage solbriller på = Now it's time to put on some sunglasses
Sikke en dejlig at cykle en tur = Such a lovely day to take a bike ride
Det er også sjovt a løbe en tur = It is also fun to go for a run
Ellers kan man bare slappe lidt af = Others you can just relax/chill a little
Det er altid en fornøjelse at få lidt frisk luft = It's always enjoyable to get a little fresh air
Sommeren er den smukkeste årstid = Summer is the most beautiful time of year
Nu er der solnedgang = Now it's sundown/sunset